Mooncrawlers

I do not blog much of late.

I do not like this.

Why are you blogging so little, Stephen?

Maybe my mind has run out of thoughts.

No thoughts and no ideas. Yeah, that sounds very close to true.

I am so fucking bored.

(You know what they say about bored people? No, what? They're boring.)

From somewhere an ant colony has learned the way to my bedroom. More particularly, to the box beside my bed I use as a night stand. Often I eat before going to bed and then leave my plate there. The ants have learned this, have learned that there is a solid chance that if they send an expedition to the Box at night they will discover some kind of food. I try to make sure they do not make it home.

What do normal people do with their time? I guess they have TV. I watch TV, thanks to the magic of the internet. The internet. I spend so much fucking wasted time here.

I have all but stopped reading books. I have not been able to sit down and read fiction for months and months and months. Nonfiction is a different story but. Not reading fiction, I forget how to write it; you can't just not read. What the hell is wrong with me.

A glance to the right reveals a shelf full of books and most of them untouched. I began this year recording all the stuff I read over at Goodreads.com; I seem to have stopped because there is nothing more to record.

This gloom is so unending. How is this the first day of June? It is chilly and overcast, as it has been almost always. Sometimes the sun comes, but always only for a day, two, three. Do you remember what seasons were like? ...Me either.

Wake up, go to work, come home, decide: Four hours of Bar or four hours of Battlestar Galactica? Either way feels sort of pointless.

I have no idea what to do with my time.

I don't know what I even enjoy.

Seriously.

What, that does not relate to science fiction or getting drunk, do I even do?

Sit there thinking conceptualizing. "Here are thoughts of stories to write," then never write them. "Here are awesome ways to reorganize society" which is never going to happen.

I just have no idea.

I think I'm getting fat.

I dreamed about cats last night. All of my cats I ever had made an appearance, but that the little white cat and the little black cat were rolled into one. I miss cats.

HLVS.